Is there something you’ve really wanted for a long time? A new career? A happier relationship? A bigger house? To make a difference in the world? These are examples of things you might have imagined are possible but aren’t within your grasp at the moment. So how do you get them? GRASP them!

You can look at any dream or vision as requiring five key factors to help make them come true: a Goal, Resources, Attitude, Support, and a Plan. Without any one of these things being in place, the likelihood of realizing your dream goes down.

Let’s look at each of these elements in detail.

Goal. This seems pretty obvious, but is your goal really a goal, or just a vague daydream? In other words, how well-defined is your vision? What kind of job do you want? What does “happier” mean to you, in practical terms? How big of a house and where? What specific difference would you like to make, and for whom? Keep asking these kinds of questions until you are crystal clear on the who’s, what’s, where’s, and when’s of your vision.

Resources. This is where you take inventory for your dream. What do you have at your disposal right now to make it come true? What skills, knowledge, talents, and abilities do you already possess that will help you succeed? What time, money, equipment, and materials do you have to make this easier? On the flipside, what do you need? What’s missing? Making a list of both your available and absent resources helps you use what you have and go after what’s missing.

Attitude. Our attitudes about what we can and can’t do are even more important than the resources we have to accomplish our goals. You can think about all the things that can go wrong; all the times you failed; all the things that stand in your way; all the reasons why now isn’t a good time. OR… You can choose to assume that no matter what, you will achieve your goal. One might argue that this attitude is “unrealistic.” But in fact a positive attitude greatly increases the odds that you will reach your goal. Focusing on possibilities instead than problems opens up creativity, opportunities, and willingness from other people to help you succeed.

Support. Speaking of people, the more support and encouragement you have, the more likely you are to reach your dream. Who can help you obtain the resources that you’re missing? Who will bolster you up when you get discouraged? Who do you want there with you to celebrate your success? We thrive more with support, dare more with encouragement, and do more with love. How can you enlist the support of others to help you achieve your goal?

Plan. And of course, you must create a plan. Something with a schedule, doable action items, clear milestones, and finite ways to measure your progress. This doesn’t have to be elaborate-it can be as simple as outlining the steps to your goal and marking the dates when you want to accomplish each task. Putting something down “on paper” makes it more concrete; having a plan puts your dream into three dimensions (four if you count the time it takes to complete it!).

So think for a moment about something you’ve been wanting for a long time. Walk through the GRASP model and ask yourself which factors come up short or missing. Make the commitment to yourself to define the goal, determine your resources, shift your attitude, solicit support, create a plan–then grasp your dreams!

As we move my elderly father 1,000 miles closer to us, the concept of “worry” has been on my mind a lot lately. The dictionary defines worry as “feeling uneasy or concerned about something; to be troubled.” Worry can also be “to pull or tear at something with or as if with the teeth” (like a dog worrying a bone). That’s a fitting analogy for the scenarios we repeatedlygnaw on with our minds.

So, why do we worry? I believe there are several reasons:

1. We simulate negative situations to “practice” how we will handle them in real life.
2. We imagine worst-case scenarios as a kind of talisman, protecting us from their actually happening.
3. Since our brain chemistry doesn’t differentiate between real and imagined scenarios, we get addicted to the “fight or flight” chemicals released when we imagine the worst.

In truth, worrying rarely helps us. How many times has the situation you worried about actually turned out that way? What worry does do is put us in a constant state of anxiety, weakening our immune system, suppressing our creativity, and in fact making us less able to handle difficult life situations when they do arise.

Believe it or not, we choose to worry. After many years of practice that choice becomes a habit, but one that can be broken with conscious effort. Without becoming an insufferable optimist or dismissing reality, you can still choose to focus on the best-case scenario. By doing so, you send your mind and body a signal that this is the outcome you’re aiming for.

Here are a few creative ways to help break the worrying habit:

CIA. Consider the situation you’re worried about, and make a three-column list: things you can Control, things you can Influence, and things you can Accept about the situation. Take action on the first two columns, and let go of the third.

Freebird. If you’re a visual person, sometimes it helps to imagine your thoughts as something tangible. I often picture worrisome thoughts as trapped birds, frantically flapping around in my head. Then I imagine opening a window and letting them fly out. While you can use any image that works for you, I recommend finding something that signifies “letting go” or “releasing.”

Get in gear. Worrying is a lot like having your foot on the gas pedal without the car being in gear. You waste a lot of gas but don’t go anywhere. Change that potential energy into kinetic energy! Go for a walk, run up a flight of stairs, turn on some music and dance. Move your body and change your chemistry.Now’s OK. Bring yourself back to the present. Where are you and what are you doing right now? Eating breakfast, driving your car, sitting in your office, brushing your teeth, walking the dog? Chances are you’re in familiar territory. Is there anything in this moment that’s truly unmanageable? Do this each time you feel overwhelmed. By returning to the present, you reclaim your power over the situation and your life. Even when you’re faced with something new, assess the present and know that you’re handling it, right now.

Improvise on these to suit your personality. For more ideas, read 25 Ways to Break the Worrying Habit.

Before getting out of bed, you stretch. Before exercising, you stretch. Stretching warms up your muscles, gets your blood flowing, and prepares your body for whatever you’re asking it to do. Plus, stretching feels really good.

In the same way, it’s a good idea to regularly stretch your habits. Our everyday routines — what we eat, what we wear, where we go, whom we socialize with — are familiar, comfortable, and safe. However, these routines don’t really prepare us for facing change, whether well-planned or hitting us when we least expect it. What we need is a way to push our limits and make ourselves more flexible.

Habit stretching sends a signal to our brains (and bodies) that something new is coming up, telling us to rev up the engines and get the juices flowing. It improves our resiliency, and helps us meet new challenges with greater confidence and less stress.

So, how do you consciously stretch your habits? If you’re the adventurous type, you probably do this already. I have a good friend whose annual New Year’s resolution is to try something new that really scares him. I think this is a great idea, but you don’t have to be that bold to properly stretch yourself.

Start small.

• Eat something different for breakfast.
• Drive a new route to work.
• Read a section of the newspaper that you normally ignore.
• Talk to a person at the office who has nothing to do with your job.
• Go to an interesting local meeting or event that you’ve always found excuses not to attend.

Then work yourself up to bigger things.

• Take a lesson in something you’ve always wanted to try.
• Ask your boss to help strategize ways to balance your workload.
• Tell your spouse/child/best friend something you really love about them.

Feeling good? Piece of cake? Try:

• Outlining 10 important things you’d like to accomplish this year, or within 5 years.
• Devising a plan to get those things done.
• Asking yourself if you’d still be doing your same job if you had $10 million or only one year to live.

By the way, the whole purpose of stretching yourself in this way isn’t necessarily to feel wonderful afterwards. You might, of course, but the real reason is to get to know yourself better. Where are your limits? What are your hidden strengths? What’s most important to you? What’s not? Discovering these answers arms you with knowledge and abilities that guide you through the really big changes you want to make, and help you weather the ones you don’t.

So stretch yourself. Try something different before the day is through, and you might be surprised at just how good it feels.